DLand - There Are Three Things ...

Jeremy reported to me this evening that he doesn't think our new neighbor is very smart. Me: "Why?"

Jer: "He's smoking a cigarette and trying to pour gas into a gas can about a foot from his face."

In retrospect, I probably should have run out there and tried to knock some sense into him before he set his face and his entire front lawn on fire. But at the time it just seemed too strange to believe. It's a shame, too, because he seemed like such a nice young man. My mother says that people with nice neighbors take them for granted.

This evening's project has been the new ice cream maker. Ms. Bea gave it to me the other day when I was at her house. She claims she will never use it, despite ice cream being one of her favorite things. I told her that I would test drive it for her and then return it so we could try it out together. The french vanilla is churning away next to me on the kitchen table.

My father is so smart sometimes. One of the things he says is:

"There are three things in life that you will never understand fully unless you experience them first hand - sex, war and depression."

My existance, and the pictures of him in Vietnam are proof enough of the first two. But he says that until he lost his job (7 years ago he was laid off), he would have never understood true depression that others go through. It was a hard time for the whole family (I was away at college) but he made it through and eventually got his job back.

Ms. Bea is going through a hard time now. It's so strange with Daddy Byron being gone. The house is very empty now. But she's very depressed. She won't go outside at night by herself (even to put the blind dog in the back yard to "do his business"), she won't shower unless someone else is in the house, and she cries all the time. I'm certain she'll come out of it, but it's just going to take a while. And all of us are trying to be as supportive as possible.

It's kind of ironic to see how lonely she is after being trapped in the house with her husband for so many years (she doesn't drive and he couldn't after his lungs started to get the better of him). They seemed to be constantly fussing at each other (like siblings stuck in a back seat together for too long). And now the house just seems so quiet.

I can only begin to imagine. I must admit I absolutely hate being alone. I have never ever lived alone. And I don't plan on it for at least another 50 years or so if ever. I just get all morose. Pets help. But they only provide but so much companionship after a while. Sure, the occasional weekend is nice when Sweetpea has somewhere else to be. But overall, I'm a people person (despite all my cynical griping about people being stupid). Perhaps it's why Sweetpea and I were attracted to each other.

So I'm working on appreciating the people around me more. Bossman told me I was being really bitchy this morning (I was a real sour grape - just woke up grumpy). I'm glad that I have such a cool boss to tell me when I'm being a weiner instead of suffering through it. So I tried really hard to perk up and have succeeded overall today. I'm gonna go finish my ice cream (with dark chocolate chunks if I'm inspired) and apologize to Sweetpea for fussing at him about the dog's collar earlier. Mad love to you all.