Living Out Loud volume 22: Name your vice

Man, this whole writing thing is tough! You know? Which actually scares me just a little that I plan on writing every day in November for NaBloPoMo again this year. I did it with a newborn! Then again he slept all the time then versus running around the house meowing at the cats and resisting nap time. But I do have a theme for Living Out Loud! I've had it since the last one was posted but haven't been able to think of the right way to explain it. So we'll see how this goes.

Tell us what your vice is. What's your bad habit? Or if applicable, who is your bad habit? (I always think of my friend who said that a guy was Her Favorite Mistake like the Sheryl Crow song.)

You don't need to get all biblical on us, picking one of big seven deadly ones. I knew a guy once who was vegan but every October would sneak off to eat Tootsie Rolls where his vegan girlfriend couldn't find them.

Since wikipedia reminded me that vice is the opposite of virtue, maybe your vice is that you don't return the shopping carts to their corrals in the parking lot or you don't recycle.

Details include:

• Write something personal about yourself using the previous paragraphs as a guideline. Do not feel that you have to address each prompt above. The spirit of this project is to share something about yourself; I'm just throwing out ideas.

• Once you have completed your entry and posted it, please email me the link at genie [at] inabottle [dot] org. Remember, if you don't email me, I'm likely to forget to include you in the recap!

• If you do not have a blog to host your story, you can email me the story directly and I will add it here as a guest post giving you credit. The more the merrier!

• The due date for entries is Sunday, November 7th (the first Sunday of the month) at 5pm Eastern.

• Once I have collected all the entries, I will post a wrap-up to list them all and announce a winner. The winner will receive some sort of prize to be determined but all participants will receive fame and glory and a link on our Living Out Loud blogroll.

Every character has a flaw. Even the Pope probably has neglected to change the toilet paper roll on occasion. So let us in on your secret.

Recap of Living Out Loud volume 21: Back to school

I asked for cheesy high school photos and you all delivered in spades! So let's get to them: Grace's The me I used to be I was tall and also sucked at basketball. My 6'9" friend would reply when asked if he played basketball, "No, do you play miniature golf?" :) So many versions of you! I love the last photo, though. The look on your face is great.

Candice's If high school was now... I would be a Facebook addict too. I'm happy to have experienced high school pre-Internet, but wouldn't necessarily say it was better that way. :)

Rachel's High school reunion I love hearing the difference between high school you and college you. And it doesn't sound like your high school was worth going back to. We're happy you're here with us now.

Peggy's Late for Breakfast Club Holy crap, best prom photos ever. And good for you for organizing the reunions.

Erin's No Scrub Left Behind Hehe, I went to Smarty Pants School too. You say you endured. That reminds me of the Indigo Girls song "I spent 4 years prostrate to the higher mind, got my paper and I was free."

SuziCate's I Wish I Had Known Then ... "I wish I had known then that the me I was hiding was much nicer than the me I was pretending to be. I wish I had know then that I really was ok." That should be on t-shirts and handed out at high schools.

Megan's Dandelion Seeds: the story I've never told It's a very looong post, but read it all. The last few paragraphs made me cry.

Ruth's Thanks, Teach' "In his presence, I felt like I could be good." That's probably the dream of most teachers.

Karal's Reflections of Acceptance Welcome back, Karal! My GPA in college was on par with your high school one and I turned out okay. And I'm glad after having no voice back then you've found one.

And my own The me I used to be

I loved everyone's entries. I love the diversity of what you all covered, how you all interpreted it. I love how some of you feel very different than high school and some feel pretty much the same.

But mostly I love that through these entries I feel closer to all of you. In particular, I loved Megan's post. Her entry (the part after the cut) was exactly what I hoped Living Out Loud could be. The catharsis she got from it and the supportive comments just make it all the better.

So Megan is our winner this month. She'll get the customary $25 Amazon gift certificate and our high fives for a job well done. Thank you all for participating, reading and commenting. You are what makes this little project so worthwhile. I already know the next topic so stay tuned for more on that this week!

The me I used to be.

I went back through some old photos looking for insight on what I was like in high school. From what I can tell, I was playing the part of a well-educated homeless person.

It's a small consolation that it was the grunge period, which may explain my penchant for plaid.

But seriously, I left the house like this? I showed Rich this photo and he said, "you sorta look like a member of the Beastie Boys except for wearing your dad's old coat." I would like to point out I'm wearing high top Batman Chuck Taylors in this photo. And that I'm up and dressed and at school by 7:40am, something I can't accomplish now in my professional life, regardless of my wardrobe choices.

High school is a bit of a blur to me. I remember feeling frumpy at times. Too big compared to so many other tiny girls. I remember feeling like I was too loud, too opinionated, too sarcastic. I remember trying to join a sport - field hockey then basketball and not enjoying them at all. I remember discovering the dance team and it being one of the best things that happened to me. It still is.

I never had a boyfriend in high school. Sure, I had plenty of crushes, but no one gave me his class ring or invited me to homecoming. At the time I thought this was horrible, but in retrospect it's probably all for the best. No good could have come from anyone I would have dated in high school. And instead of desperately trying to get to third base, I spent my Saturday nights in Becca's den making chocolate chip cookies and watching Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman.

I always said I wasn't good at making female friends. But until recently when I've discovered blogging buddies and some other moms, the most female friends I had was during high school.

Rich mentioned in the car today that he hoped no one would say they were the same person they were in high school. I'm not sure I agree. I don't see myself as that different that who I was then. I'm a lot more patient and less dogmatic; experience will do that for you. I still feel pretty comfortable in my own skin, though I still feel pretty big compared to others around me. I've just gotten used to it. I still am a bit of a worrier and way too responsible, I've just learned to occasionally shrug stuff off (Zoloft helps with that, I admit).

I still spend a lot of energy on my friends and think it makes me a better person for it. I'm still stubborn. I still hang out with my parents a lot. I still wait til the last minute to complete any assignment. I still regularly make regrettable wardrobe choices when I leave the house in the morning.

The biggest thing I can see is that while I didn't change that much, I feel like everyone and everything around me has for the better. I found a handsome husband who appreciates my Batman Chucks. I found a job where I can wear jeans and flip flops to the office (take THAT, private school dress code!). I found an outlet for my creativity in writing and sewing. And I've found many many many friends along the way. The only things I miss from high school are being able to sing every morning and dance every afternoon. I should work on that.

Overall, though, I still feel like me.