Facebook Archive - January 2019

Jan 4 - We got to Wintergreen ski resort (the last five miles in very dense fog), checked in, brought all our stuff up three flights of stairs (it took three trips), parked the car, unloaded the cooler, marveled at the snow, took our pills, and crawled into bed. 

In the darkness, Ian rolled over and put his hand on my arm, “You don’t have anyone to share an anniversary with anymore.” 

I just started laughing at the ridiculous timing of his comment. 😂😳😒Thanks, kiddo.

Jan 5 - Our ski day started out less than ideal because I felt anxious about having to be THE ADULT for everything and guide my kid through it all when I haven’t been on skis in over 20 years. That’s one of those things not in the handbook. There is no other adult to share any emotional load. When your own kid is worried about everything new, you don’t have the luxury of worrying yourself. 

My Hot Young Widows Club helped me get going as well as a Xanax I scrounged out of the depths of my purse. We had our lesson from 11-12:15 and kept skiing until 1pm. We took a break for lunch where I promptly fell asleep on the couch. 

Ian was dragging me back out the door at 3pm and we made it back to the room right before 7pm. It was exactly *right* before Ian had a meltdown from exhaustion and *right* before my blood sugar went low. We totally stuck the landing. 

We’re in our underwear on the couch again eating random things for dinner (fried rice, a shrimp ring from Costco, leftover Christmas cheese, the other half of Ian’s burger, a honey crisp apple, LOTS of Gatorade and water). 

We finished our last run and were riding the lift back.
Ian: “On a scale of 1-10, how did I do?”
Me: “Um ... I’d say a 14.”

I only fell once. Ian fell maybe five times but one of those was on purpose because he picked up too much speed. I am so stinking proud of him. 

I had to get three people to help me get out of my boot. This is fine as I’ve never met a stranger. It was funny to have the two young men I first approached desperately want to rescue me with the “strong fingers” I proclaimed them to have. The rental guy explained I unbuckled in the wrong order and he fixed it with his deft tiny little fingers (and experience).

We’re sweaty, muddy, and exhausted. And we had a great day. We even had a rainbow!

Jan 7 - Ian (heading towards me from the couch): “Hey mom, I wanna show you this. It’s really funny!”

Me: “Are you about to bring your iPad 4” from my head to show me a Vine video of someone screaming something I can’t understand?”

Ian: *turns around and goes back to the couch*

Jan 7 - Ian wants me to wear the Chris Pronger 2010 winter classic jersey to the game tomorrow. It was one of 11 Flyers jerseys I had to choose from that were Rich’s. I also counted 40 other jerseys in the jersey closet. (We have a jersey closet.)

Jan 8 - Me: “Can you not start any shit? With old men? Please?” 

It was a great game and an exciting ending.

Jan 9 - I do things to help mitigate anxiety in our tiny household. I printed up this crib sheet for Ian to hold that listed all our stops between Tysons Corner and Metro Center so he could follow along. It helped a lot. And his not pestering me about stops, it helped me too.

Jan 14 - We were talking about how long Ian’s heated mattress pad stays on for.
Me: “I dunno. I think eight hours?”
Ian (shaking his head as he walked off to brush his teeth): “I don’t know what kind of person only gets eight hours of sleep.”

Jan 16 - My new Vans are men’s size 8.5. Ian’s new Vans are men’s size 8.

Jan 19 - My kid is definitely more of a warrior character class versus a scout, but we finished a 5K “cookie run” with Laura to support the Girl Scouts this morning. There were cookies at all the way stations! And the medal is adorable.

Jan 23 - Ian is eating peanut shells and this is basically proof he is Rich Stryker’s son. 🤢 (Rich ate the shells of his peanuts in the Army so he didn’t have to police them.)

Jan 24 - Ian just asked if he could get “trench hand” from being in the tub for too long with pruny fingers.

Jan 25 - When my kid tells me he’s SO HUNGRY, I make sure he picks something I also like so I don’t mind finishing the 75% he can’t when he’s SO FULL.

Jan 29 - I had Rich’s t-shirts turned into lap blankets for me and Ian. The price and turnaround time from Project RePat was amazing.

Jan 30 - I know some parents restrict kids’ internet access because of sexual predators or violence. I just want to keep my 9yo off WebMD.

Facebook Archive - December 2018

Dec 4 - Ian just lobbied that children should take their mother’s last name because she’s the one taking all the risks and enduring all the effort to bring them into the world. ❤️

Dec 9 - Ian’s #lunchboxnote from the other day came back torn and that’s not usual. I asked him and he said, “I was trying to find the answer and wondered if maybe the card got stuck together so I ripped it trying to open it.” The whole lunch table agreed this was the best plan. 

Dec 11 - Ian and I had a discussion last night about emotional labor. While he is 9 and I am the parent, one day he will need to handle a lot more stuff. It would be great if he could do more than just his own stuff, but contribute to his household versus expecting his partner to manage it all and provide directions, reminders, and deadlines.

Ironically, while we were talking this through, my phone went off with the quarterly reminder to replace the batteries in the dogs' collars (our dog door has a proximity lock). It was a great example of the weight of things to remember and manage. 

No one notices when or if the dog collar batteries get replaced, but there would be a crisis if the dogs got locked outside in bad weather because of a dead battery. 

If you'd like to share your version of the batteries you've quiet replaced without recognition, we're here for you with cheers of gratitude and love.

Dec 14 - You guys!! Ian got a letter back from Santa! It even smells like peppermint!

Dec 17 - Ian: “... my emotions let me have sympathy for people, and I mean a lot of sympathy ...”

Dec 21 - When I left to go country line dancing last night, Ian asked when he could come home from my folks’ in the morning. 
“I have to work at home so I’ll be up.”
“So like 7?”
“Sure.”

I made a point of setting my alarm for 7am so I’d be awake. I got a text at 7:01am. 

I can put on pants and shoes, walk to the end of our street, and untangle a shoelace from the gears of a bike in under five minutes. 

Technically, sunrise wasn’t until 7:14am so we did all that pre dawn. I’m gonna clean the grease off my fingers and make coffee.

Dec 22 - I had the intention of lighting a bonfire on Solstice night, but instead took Ian roller skating and then fell asleep in his bed. Maybe we can celebrate the second longest night of the year.

Dec 22 - Today has not gone as planned. Ian threw up three times this morning before Phenergan did its magic and he passed out. By 2pm, my mom came over so I could grocery shop for Christmas. I spent a zillion dollars and am still not sure what we’re gonna eat for dinner tomorrow. But we’ll eat like gods on Tuesday. My mom wrapped the presents Ian bought for me yesterday while I was gone and she may be the best present wrapper on Earth. She’s coming back with bigger bows in a few days! 😍 We had pastrami sandwiches from the French bakery on Granby street and split half a rum ball that is strong enough to make you shiver. I doubt I’ll have a bonfire tonight because Ian won’t want me to light stuff on fire without him. Plenty more dark nights to fill with light ahead.

Dec 25 - This Christmas gets a most improved over the last two years. Ian loved all his presents and was genuinely surprised. He was even more excited to watch me open my gifts from him. He wanted there to be gifts for everyone and we adults have sorta set that practice aside. Maybe we’ll revisit something like a Secret Santa in the future. 

Dinner was good but some dishes didn’t come out as tasty as I wanted them too. Good thing we have twelve days to work on this stuff. I’m making fresh corn pudding and patticakes tomorrow. 

I’m physically tired and a little emotionally weary too. I miss Healthy Rich. That guy was great. He would have really enjoyed today. 

Ian got a Flyers jersey from Uncle Lee and Granddad that fits perfectly. And he was gobsmacked that his big present from me is center ice tickets to a Flyers vs Capitals game in two weeks. I’ll have to get a Gritty t-shirt. 

Ian got me two things I specifically asked for (a spring form pan and a butter dish), but he also got me two things all on his own. A journal that says “life is not measured by its length, but by its depth” and my very own “sick blanket.” He missed a day of school last month and when I went to get him cold meds I picked him up a super plush blanket and called it his “sick blanket.” He wanted me to have one too.

He’s not perfect. He tried to cut open a hand warmer packet with scissors at 9:50pm and covered my kitchen floor in whatever toxic charcoal alien shit is in them while I was actively trying to finish cleaning up so we could go to bed. But he’s pretty damn great.

Dec 26 (from our neighbor Rachel) - Seems strange to post on FB when I can look through my window into your but your Christmas post reminded me to tell you how much I love your kid. He stopped by to play with Joey at the perfect time yesterday. There was a little sunlight left and Joey was exhausted but bored. Ian is so kind and polite. He told us all about his presents then listened to Joey talk about his. I gave him a Christmas card and he was genuinely grateful. I watched him and Joey through the window for a bit. Ian was patiently showing him some skateboard tricks the grass. U could tell he was being cautious of joeys safety. He’s so sweet and able to have a good time with Joey despite the age difference. Joey adores him! Merry Christmas!

Dec 28 - We visited Granddad and Uncle Lee in Richmond this afternoon. Lee gave Ian a bag of Rich’s Hextall cards, showing him how Rich taped one to each of his goalie sticks as part of his ritual. I had forgotten all about that and Granddad didn’t know about it at all. It takes all of us to remember each of the parts of the elephant.

Dec 30 - We’ve decided to try out “bark & bulbs” after work on Thursday. I suggested we only take Dante because Mollie gets tired, but Ian was adamant. 

“It’s just like if I were 60 and [his cousin] Harrison were 40 and there was a Minecraft convention and you only wanted to take Harrison even though we’d both like it just because I’m older and would get tired!”

So we’ll be taking both dogs. Feel free to join us if you wanna mosey with us old folks. 😂

Dec 31 - “Ooh, stuff is getting intense!” Ian is writing a comic while the dog seeks comfort from the fireworks. I’m yawning. Happy new year, everyone!

Facebook Archive - November 2018

Nov 7 - Ian is walking the neighborhood with his Halloween candy trying to sell it, as if he has no idea about supply and demand.

Nov 10 - At Ian’s request, we went to see “The Hate U Give” today. It was so good! I didn’t even know the movie existed, but Ian had seen the trailer on YouTube and researched it. He literally begged to see a PG-13 drama about race relations. 

He’s been sort of a butthead lately but then he utterly impresses me.

Nov 11 - We got a book last night about all the battles that “changed history” so Ian is *taking notes* about Pearl Harbor while I cook lunch. Happy Veterans Day

Nov 17 - We went to Hobby Town, Barnes & Noble, Paper Source, and Dick’s Sporting Goods and my kid only picked out things for other people. #mombrag

Nov 26 - 9yo check-up Ian is 5’ 3/4” and 150 lb